you can’t always get what you want

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I didn’t blog at all last week. I just wasn’t feeling up to it because I have been such a downer lately. I don’t like to come on here and complain about life, but sometimes it’s a good outlet for me. Plus I don’t think too many people actually read this so it’s more just for myself. I had myself a good pity party for basically the entire weekend. Feeling hopeful for things you dream of only to have them all fall apart in front of your eyes so quickly. My husband picks me back up from the heartache even though he is just as heartbroken as me. He still finds a way to comfort me when he’s feeling the same pain. After it all settled in we put our lives back in perspective and had hope, that what we want most will come when it’s supposed to. Until then I have my two loves who help me go on when I feel like I can’t.

my little boy

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Monday came really fast this weekend. We were really enjoying time at home to do nothing but relax and watch the Olympics. Now it’s time for another busy week again. I looked at the calendar the other day and realized that my baby boy was 26 months old. He is so big and smart and saying sentences. It’s crazy that I pretty much always know what he’s saying and what he wants. It makes life easier but it’s kinda sad too because he’s growing out of the baby stage. Although to me he still seems like a baby and I’m sure will feel that way until we have another one. Stay this way just a little while longer my boy.

that tantrum life

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overalls: madewell// shoes: vince (sold out similar here)// hat: j.crew (similar)

These pictures give you a pretty good idea of how Beau reacts when you tell him no. Honestly most of the time he is such a good sweet boy, but his tantrums are no joke. Our month of July has been so busy to the point where we can’t handle it anymore. We just want to stay home and do nothing! So this next weekend that is exactly what we are doing and I already can’t wait. Until then we will be watching a lot of olympics. I LOVE the Olympics! We have also been watching a new netflix show called Stranger Things, which kind of scares me. And I just started The Vampire Diaries which I am now obsessed with. Blake definitely won’t watch that 😉

my best friend’s wedding

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These are just a few of the shots of my best friend Annie’s wedding day. She was the most beautiful bride I’d ever seen, literally. Annie and her fiancé Damon had been engaged for a year so they had been waiting for this day forever. But really Annie and I have been talking about it for like 20 years. I did get some shots of the two of them together that I’ll have to share in another post. They are a gorgeous couple. They got married in Santa Barbara outside where it was beautiful and dreamy and everything anyone could hope for. I’m so happy I got to be a part of their special day! I love her so much. Happy wedding day beautiful bride!

family campout

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I’m bummed that these photos are so fuzzy, but we were camping and I didn’t even realize they turned out this bad. At least I tried right? We usually go camping for one night, once a year with friends since we aren’t really the “campiest” family. But we always enjoy our overnighter with good friends. Plus Beau really loved getting dirty and throwing rocks. He even slept in the tent pretty great, which we were a little nervous about. But we all survived and even had a really fun time! I mean, I’m happy to be back in my own bed, but it was fun while it lasted.

We are off to California for a little family vacation and my best friend’s wedding on Sunday. We are so ready for a getaway, I can’t even explain how much we need a vacation right now! I’m super excited to take Beau to Disneyland! He loves Mickey Mouse and Cars so hopefully he loves them in person as much as he does on tv. Be back next week!

life lately

My baby looks so big in this photo, but also still like an infant. It makes me happy and sad all at once because time gets away from you when you’re chasing a toddler. Life has been crummy lately. Lots of things that just haven’t gone our way, and it’s hard. No one tells you that it can feel this hard. No one’s dying here, I mean we are fine, really. But still a little heartbroken over a few things. I think it’s ok sometimes to blog about crappy things instead of just happy sunny things, because that’s how life happens. We have so many happy sunny days that we are grateful for too. I’m mostly grateful for a husband that gives me butterflies every day, and a baby who gives me a run for my money, and also soooo much joy. Gosh, I love them. The crappy things will pass eventually, but until then I’ll just watch this boy grow in his sleep.

weekend walk

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hat: target// t-shirt: c/o brickyard buffalo// jeans: asos// shoes: tevas

We just got home from a little getaway at Brian Head with Blake’s family. We had a great time but boy am I happy to be back in my bed! Beau never sleeps great in a pack and play so he was scrunched in between Blake and me in a queen bed. We didn’t get much sleep. This weekend we will be relaxing and staying home. We’ve had some stressful and emotional weeks in the family lately so we are ready to enjoy time together for a stress-free weekend. xoxo

fourth of july weekend

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So these are really random photos of our 4th of July weekend since I hardly took any (ugh). I celebrated my birthday on the 3rd of July and turned 29 years old, which sounds like a huge number to me. I’m not saying 29 is old or anything but being one year away from 30 just feels strange. It was a really great weekend spent with two really incredible boys. Since my b-day was on a Sunday we just stayed home, had eggs and sausage for dinner, and my favorite gluten free cake of all time. Beau gets so excited if we sing “Happy Birthday” since he always assumes it’s for him and thinks he gets presents. He literally sings happy birthday every single day most likely in hope of getting to eat ice cream and be showered with gifts. Sorry pal. Our 4th of July was spent working on a mini trampoline and swing set Grandma insisted on getting him. I’m not kidding it took Blake and I at least 10 hours to put this thing together. By the time we finished, on day two, it was 5pm and we were too tired to go anywhere to watch fireworks so we stayed inside and didn’t see any. I really love the 4th of July so it’s kind of a sad story, but seeing Beau play on his new swing made all the work worth it, and then I didn’t even care about fireworks. He swung on that tiny swing for a solid 30 minutes without getting off once!

It was a happy weekend and now we are off to a little vacation with Blake’s family for a few days. The month of July is one of my favorites, and this one is going to be good.

stay a baby, little boy

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romper: c/o rad revolution kids

This boy is so big. At his 2 year check up at the pediatrician it was time for him to use the big boy scale instead of the baby one. It made me a little sad that he grew so big, so fast. He still looks like a baby to me even if he is 30 pounds. Is it just me or do babies look the squishiest when they are in rompers, or onesies, or footy jammies? I love this teal romper that rad revolution kids sent us. Blake and I just couldn’t stop smiling seeing him in it! It somehow makes him look more like a baby than a toddler which makes it a favorite for me because I’m all about keeping this boy a baby for as long as I can.

to the best dad, on father’s day

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These two are just the definition of joy for me. I’m pretty sure Beau would prefer if I worked all day to pay the bills and Dad could stay home to watch him. The other morning I told Beau to say goodbye to his daddy and instead he latched tighter to his dad and said “bye bye mama”. I always have to distract him when he leaves for work or else it is an instant meltdown. And it really is just wonderful, the relationship they have with each other. It makes me so happy that Beau will always have a dad who tells him how much he loves him, and plays with him, and who also helps discipline so it’s not always mama being “mean”. Blake is the best father, and Beau (& myself) are blessed that we have him to keep forever. He works hard for us every day, so we can be home together. Because he is the best father ( & husband) I get to fulfill my greatest dream of raising my babies at home. I love you Blake. There is not a person who has met you that doesn’t love you. But I will always love you most.